Be the change you want to see.

The prompt was "Nessie" but I'm taking this somewhere else underwater.

Longing. Have you ever been shamed for what you craved? Has your longing ever been pointed out as wrong or weird or twisted or broken or an imposition or something unnecessary?

I have. I've been shamed for wanting things, for wanting experiences, for wanting people. And I don't think that was right. And most days I'm okay, most days it feels like I'm over it, but today is not one of those days.

The thing about a longing is it doesn't come out of your mind. It's not a thought. It wells up from deep in your belly, deep in your heart, or dare I say it, spirit or soul. You can't talk yourself out of a longing.

You can hold yourself quiet about it, can keep the surface of your personal pond pristine and peaceful. Still, underneath the surface something lives, something moves, something travels. Something roils the water beneath the surface.

And there are days where I can no longer bear to live on the quiet pristine peaceful surface. On a day like today, I sink below to the Deep places, where the water presses through my flesh and into my bones.

I sink down to the deep mud churned places, where I can finally breathe.

day 8 Prompt: Yokai

Yokai is a word I looked up:
I don't know Japanese culture.
Bits. Fragments, only, really.
Kitsune the only example I recognized.
Dim memory that :demon: in that millenia old culture
Means something quite different
than what I might assume.
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Trickster? Demigod? Supernatural being of uncertain motivations?
Is Yokai more like the Fae of Irish tradition?
Or Coyote in Southwest North America?
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My ignorance is large.
I don't even know if the word is singular or plural
(I'd guess plural)
Wondering could I compare Loki, Hermes, Anansi, in the same category
(are there female Yokai?)
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Seanan McGuire has a character who's Kitsune.
That's pretty much my whole experience.
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There's a whole deep mythology I'm missing.
I may never understand.
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I forgive myself for my own ignorance
and I pray I'll be lucky enough
or kind enough, or careful enough
that others will forgive me for my ignorance, too.

Poem a day
Haunted Object, Day 7

The skull clattered on the mantlepiece.
An unearthly voice cleaved the darkness:
...repent...
said the voice, as ice crystals formed on the windows.
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Shivering, and full of nameless fears, I replied,
"wwwhat? what should I repent, dread spirit?"
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The bones rattled again, in a decidedly impatient fashion, I thought.
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...repent your lies... repent your drunkenness and debauchery ... repent that hole in your heart where compassion should be! ... repent your betrayal of the American Dream!...
Gradually growing louder, it finally yelled, ...and repent all of your actions, which have besmirched your family name!...
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after a moment of terror, the penny dropped for me.
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"Oh honey. You're haunting the wrong family member. I'm BRITTANY Kavanaugh. You obviously want my punk-ass bitch cousin Brett, who never met a beer he didn't like or a girl he didn't lust after in his heart."
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The moment of silence that came from the clattering skull could have been characterized as sheepish.
*
...very well then...
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The temperature of the room slowly began to increase, and my breath stopped fogging in the air.
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...you may pass. my apologiesssssssss for the error...
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Best believe I was out of there faster than a Republican denies responsibility for his or her actions...
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Apologies for bringing current events into it, but I'm going with the first prompt interpretation that hits my brain, and I thought this was funny. it's better than the rage I've been swimming in, I'll take it.

Drawlloween prompt October 4: Mushroom
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Don't be a mushroom.
Mushrooms root in bullshit and dark,
Grown for consumption.
*
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(don't be a mushroom.)
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The current Republican administration, the kakistocracy, in 2018, is parting us out and selling us off. Or butchering us, and wrapping the parts for easier consumption. Depends on which metaphor you prefer: are we machines, are we animals? we're definitely, most humans under this administration, seen as disposable, consumable, sheep to be sheared and slaughtered.
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Some of us are not sheep.
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Many of us have opposable thumbs, can think and plan and RESIST.
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Please join me in finding ways to throw sand, monkeywrenches, in the gears of those who would conquer and subjugate the Land of the Free.

Prompt: Black Cat (for Rosalyn, the cat that was almost mine too)

fingers down your spine, ruffling your fur
softly blinking down at you
i love you i love you i love you with every blink

you blink back
you offer belly
my eyes fill with tears
this is a new trust
a new vulnerability

in a life that had precious little trust
and even less vulnerability to spare
that moment
long elegant legs outstretched
rusty red tipped black plush fur
warm along my leg on a cold day

i plunged my hand into your fur, but gently
i relished the moment, my heart hurting
but blinked back down at you

i love you i love you i love you